2 Samuel 13:16 - Printer Friendly

ESV: But she said to him, "No, my brother, for this wrong in sending me away is greater than the other that you did to me." But he would not listen to her.

NIV: "No!" she said to him. "Sending me away would be a greater wrong than what you have already done to me." But he refused to listen to her.

NASB: But she said to him, 'No, because this wrong in sending me away is greater than the other that you have done to me!' Yet he would not listen to her.

CSB: "No," she cried, "sending me away is much worse than the great wrong you’ve already done to me!" But he refused to listen to her.

NLT: No, no!' Tamar cried. 'Sending me away now is worse than what you’ve already done to me.' But Amnon wouldn’t listen to her.

KJV: And she said unto him, There is no cause: this evil in sending me away is greater than the other that thou didst unto me. But he would not hearken unto her.

NKJV: So she said to him, “No, indeed! This evil of sending me away is worse than the other that you did to me.” But he would not listen to her.

Amnon, David's oldest son, has just raped his half-sister Tamar. She knows that unless she is widowed, a young woman who is not a virgin, even by rape, is no longer an option for a wife among respectable people. Amnon has literally ruined Tamar's chances of being a respected wife and mother in society. In that culture, being a wife and mother was the most important role a woman could have.

The law of Moses has a specific requirement for exactly this situation. Deuteronomy 22:28–29 says, "If a man meets a virgin who is not betrothed, and seizes her and lies with her, and they are found, then the man who lay with her shall give to the father of the young woman fifty shekels of silver, and she shall be his wife, because he has violated her. He may not divorce her all his days."

Tamar's only hope is that Amnon will marry her now, as the law requires, and they can have a legitimate marriage in the sight of God, their father, and the people. Tamar is willing to live in a marriage that breaks the incest laws because it is her right for him to marry her (Leviticus 18:9, 11). Amnon, though, no longer wants her. He makes no offer to take care of her in any way. He just utterly despises her.

This situation reflects the culture of that time and place. No woman today must marry the man who raped her. Being raped does not disqualify a woman from marrying another. Nor does it diminish a woman's worth: at all. It does not make her shameful, and it certainly doesn't change how much God loves her. The law in Deuteronomy 22 was God's way of loving and protecting women who had been raped in a patriarchal culture that didn't value women.

In this chapter, God's curse that the sword will strike David's house (2 Samuel 12:10) begins to emerge. David's firstborn son Amnon lusts over half-sister Tamar. Tamar fights back, but Amnon first rapes her and then rejects her. David is angry but does nothing. Two years later, Tamar's full brother Absalom murders Amnon. Three years after that, Absalom returns and becomes the enemy in David's house who takes his wives in public (2 Samuel 12:11–12; 15:1–16; 16:21–23).

This begins fulfillment of some of God's curses against David (2 Samuel 12:10), and sets the scene for others (2 Samuel 12:11–12). David's oldest son, Amnon, rapes his own half-sister, Tamar. Her full brother Absalom murders Amnon, starting a five-year campaign of vengeance against David. By the end, two of David's sons will be dead, his daughter will be desolate, and David will be deeply humbled (2 Samuel 14—19).

Second Samuel continues the story of David, who will become king over Judah. The other tribes of Israel are resistant, eventually sparking a civil war. David wins and makes Jerusalem his capital. Early success is followed by moral failure and controversy in David's house. The book of 1 Kings will begin by detailing David's decline and death.