What does Proverbs 25:15 mean?
ESV: With patience a ruler may be persuaded, and a soft tongue will break a bone.
NIV: Through patience a ruler can be persuaded, and a gentle tongue can break a bone.
NASB: Through patience a ruler may be persuaded, And a gentle tongue breaks bone.
CSB: A ruler can be persuaded through patience, and a gentle tongue can break a bone.
NLT: Patience can persuade a prince, and soft speech can break bones.
KJV: By long forbearing is a prince persuaded, and a soft tongue breaketh the bone.
NKJV: By long forbearance a ruler is persuaded, And a gentle tongue breaks a bone.
Verse Commentary:
Solomon (Proverbs 25:1) commends the person who exhibits patience and speaks softly when trying to convince those in authority. The Hebrew terms used here can also apply to judges or chiefs. Harsh, impatient words typically make others more resistant (Proverbs 15:1). This is especially true of employers and government officials (Proverbs 14:35; 20:2) who may react poorly to impolite criticism. A wiser approach is to be patient, waiting for the right time to give the right words (Proverbs 15:23). The Hebrew phrase translated "patience" or "forbearance" is ō'rek ap'payim, which literally means "length of anger" and implies delaying one's frustration before reacting. Rather than rushing to confrontation, one can use patience to convince those in authority of their views.

The reference to a tongue breaking bone is a figure of speech; the lesson is that soft words can accomplish difficult tasks. Well-timed, well-chosen words can persuade a ruler to pursue a difficult course of action. An example of the power of soft words is seen in Abigail's conversation with David. Her husband Nabal arrogantly rejected David's request for provisions; David was prepared to retaliate. However, Abigail went to David and persuaded him not to shed blood (1 Samuel 25). David responded: "Blessed be your discretion, and blessed be you, who have kept me this day from bloodguilt and from working salvation with my own hand" (1 Samuel 25:33).
Verse Context:
Proverbs 25:15–28 provides sound counsel about personal relationships. Most of the teachings involve the best way to interact with others, whether they are friends, enemies, spouses, or strangers. Also included are suggestions about self-control.
Chapter Summary:
This chapter includes more statements from Solomon, copied by scribes of King Hezekiah many years later. The first section speaks about the risks of arrogance. The next gives comparisons which teach spiritual lessons. The last segment teaches about relationships, reputation, and self-control.
Chapter Context:
Chapter 25 begins to relate more wise statements from Solomon. Depending on where they are divided or combined, these amount to around one hundred portions of godly wisdom. These were compiled and added about 250 years after Solomon's reign by men under the direction of King Hezekiah. The phrasing used in verse 1 suggests these were copied from other records into the scrolls associated with the prior proverbs. This collection runs through the end of chapter 29.
Book Summary:
Proverbs is best understood in context with the books of Ecclesiastes and Job. In Proverbs, “wisdom” is given in short, simple, general terms. Ecclesiastes represents wisdom based on observation and experience. This often shows how the general principles of the book of Proverbs don’t apply in absolutely every circumstance. Job represents wisdom based on the experience of suffering and injustice. All three come to the conclusion that God does indeed know best, and the most sensible course of action is to follow His will.
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