What does Proverbs 11:16 mean?
ESV: A gracious woman gets honor, and violent men get riches.
NIV: A kindhearted woman gains honor, but ruthless men gain only wealth.
NASB: A gracious woman attains honor, And ruthless men attain riches.
CSB: A gracious woman gains honor, but violent people gain only riches.
NLT: A gracious woman gains respect, but ruthless men gain only wealth.
KJV: A gracious woman retaineth honour: and strong men retain riches.
NKJV: A gracious woman retains honor, But ruthless men retain riches.
Verse Commentary:
This verse suffers from translation from one language to another. The subtle point made here is easily lost when moving to a different culture or speech pattern. In this case, Solomon is still making contrasts. Here, he points to a woman who exhibits grace, and the respect she gains from others, as opposed to the money earned by those who are graceless. The implication is that a gracious person can earn both respect and income, whereas the callous person can only gain money. The context of this passage shows the callous person's approach to be an extremely poor investment (Proverbs 11:4, 7). Some translations hint at this implication by adding the word "only," though there's no equivalent to this in the Hebrew text, itself.

First Samuel 25 reports an incident illustrating the difference between an unkind man, Nabal, and his kind wife, Abigail. Abigail was "discerning and beautiful," but Nabal was "harsh and badly behaved" (1 Samuel 25:3). In fact, Nabal's name literally means "fool," and the root Hebrew word is used exactly that way in certain verses of Proverbs (Proverbs 17:7; 30:22).

David and his men were in the wilderness and in need of food as they protected local shepherds. He dispatched ten young men to request food from Nabal, the master of some of those shepherds. Although Nabal was very rich, and had 3,000 sheep and a thousand goats, he refused to grant David's request. When Abigail, Nabal's wife, learned about this, she hurried and carried abundant provisions to David. Soon, Nabal suffered a fatal heart attack, and Abigail became David's wife. The kind woman received honor, but the violent man obtained only riches, which he left behind in death.
Verse Context:
Proverbs 11:16–22 continues Solomon's series of contrasts. Here he compares the beautiful life of those who pursue God's truth with that of those who live in their own sinful ways. He also contrasts the righteous person's end of life with that of the wicked person. He portrays the wicked person as an abomination in the sight of the Lord, whereas the righteous person is a delight to the Lord.
Chapter Summary:
Many of the proverbs in this section deal with contrasts between those who are righteous and those who are wicked. Righteous people follow God's will, bring honor and blessing on themselves, and have hope. Evil people disobey God, bring trouble on others, are hated, and their lives lead to disaster.
Chapter Context:
This continues a long passage filled with Solomon's general, common-sense observations. As in chapter 10, Solomon presents a variety of contrasts. We see distinctions such as those between integrity and dishonesty, trust in wealth and trust in the Lord, wise and foolish talk, true riches and false riches, the blessing of the righteous and the harm caused by the wicked, and the respective rewards of the godly and those who are evil.
Book Summary:
Proverbs is best understood in context with the books of Ecclesiastes and Job. In Proverbs, “wisdom” is given in short, simple, general terms. Ecclesiastes represents wisdom based on observation and experience. This often shows how the general principles of the book of Proverbs don’t apply in absolutely every circumstance. Job represents wisdom based on the experience of suffering and injustice. All three come to the conclusion that God does indeed know best, and the most sensible course of action is to follow His will.
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