Proverbs 17:9 - Printer Friendly

ESV: Whoever covers an offense seeks love, but he who repeats a matter separates close friends.

NIV: Whoever would foster love covers over an offense, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends.

NASB: One who conceals an offense seeks love, But one who repeats a matter separates close friends.

CSB: Whoever conceals an offense promotes love, but whoever gossips about it separates friends.

NLT: Love prospers when a fault is forgiven, but dwelling on it separates close friends.

KJV: He that covereth a transgression seeketh love; but he that repeateth a matter separateth very friends.

NKJV: He who covers a transgression seeks love, But he who repeats a matter separates friends.

Solomon offers a contrast between discretion and gossip. Godly "discretion" does not mean ignoring offenses or hiding crimes. This is not the attitude referred to in English as "sweeping it under the rug." Rather, those who seek to demonstrate love (John 13:34–35; Romans 12:10) aim for repentance and reconciliation (Proverbs 10:12). That might involve consequences (1 Corinthians 5:13), but the primary goal is bringing others closer to God. Choosing to handle offenses with grace can even convince an enemy of their own wrongdoing (Proverbs 16:7).

The opposite extreme from entirely ignoring a problem is indiscretion: repeating the news of an offense to those who have no reason to know about it. As with the first half of the proverb, the intent is not to discourage accountability. Informing authorities is not gossip; saying nothing could mean enabling sin. What this part of the proverb describes are personal differences, mistakes, or embarrassments (Proverbs 12:16). "Blabbing" about someone else's shortcomings is a form of damaging, evil speech (Proverbs 16:27–28). Even good friendships can be destroyed by such betrayals.

The New Testament strongly condemns gossip and the actions of a busybody. It encourages believers to help whenever a brother is overtaken in a transgression. Galatians 6:1 instructs: "Brothers, if anyone is caught in a transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted."

Proverbs 17:7–21 continues Solomon's wise observations. These remarks touch on speech, fools, strife, true friendship, co-signing loans, love of sinning, and what a fool can expect thanks to his foolishness. Numerous comments involve errors that lead to arguments and division. Some observations make a statement and then add to it, others present vivid contrasts.

This portion of Solomon's wise sayings involves several recurring themes. Among these are the importance of controlling one's words: hasty or spiteful language can do great harm. He also notes how wisdom and foolishness tend to be self-perpetuating. Wise people seek wisdom, foolish people seem immune to it. Other important topics are the impact of ungodly children on a family and the value of integrity and common sense.

Proverbs is best understood in context with the books of Ecclesiastes and Job. In Proverbs, “wisdom” is given in short, simple, general terms. Ecclesiastes represents wisdom based on observation and experience. This often shows how the general principles of the book of Proverbs don’t apply in absolutely every circumstance. Job represents wisdom based on the experience of suffering and injustice. All three come to the conclusion that God does indeed know best, and the most sensible course of action is to follow His will.